Picture of Billie Holiday

Billie Holiday, photo from timetoast.com

"Blue Moon"

The song “Blue Moon” (1952) was originally sung by Billie Holiday, an influential jazz singer in the 1930s through the 1950s. The lyrics of "Blue Moon" are featured on the right. Her notoriety comes from “her distinctive phrasing and expressive, sometimes melancholy voice.” Holiday’s two most famous songs are “God Bless the Child” and “Strange Fruit.”

Blue moon

You saw me standing alone

Without a dream in my heart

Without a love of my own

 

Blue moon

You knew just what I was there for

You heard me saying a prayer for

Someone I really could care for

 

And then they suddenly appeared before me

The only one my arms will ever hold

I heard somebody whisper

Please adore me

And when I looked

The moon had turned to gold

 

Blue moon

Now I’m no longer alone

Without a dream in my heart

Without a love of my own

Blue moon

You saw me standing alone

Without a dream in my heart

Without a love of my own

 

Blue moon

You knew just what I was there for

You heard me saying a prayer for

Someone I really could care for

 

And then they suddenly appeared before me

The only one my arms will ever hold

I heard somebody whisper

Please adore me

And when I looked

The moon had turned to gold

 

Blue moon

Now I’m no longer alone

Without a dream in my heart

Without a love of my own

 

Blue moon

Late Night
 The bartender nods and begins to mix the Tom Collins I had ordered seconds before. A gentle breeze blows into Uncle John’s bar as the door swings open, letting in more men who come to relax after a long week of work. I look around, taking in the new faces, and notice that Charles is already talking to someone new. Matthew sends me a knowing look from our table, and we laugh because we both know that won’t be the only man drawn to Charles tonight. “Here you are,” I hear the bartender say. I turn around and see my drink waiting for me on the dark oak bar. I hand him my cash and take a moment to admire my new haircut in the mirror before heading back to the table where Charles and Matt are alone again. “Well, I see you’ve broken a new record tonight,” I joke, “What – less than five minutes of us being here and you’ve already found someone?” “What’s so wrong with being social, huh? That’s what we’re here for now isn’t it? Anyway, it’s not my fault I’m irresistible,” Charles grinned as he sipped his cocktail. Matt chimes in, “Most of us are just trying to meet someone, while you on the other hand are apparently trying to meet every man in all of St. Louis.” We all laugh. Sometimes I forget that I’ve only known Matt and Charles for a couple of months. “You’re right! I guess I’m just an open book. I believe that sharing everything keeps us honest,” Charles continues with a smile, “See, that’s where we’re different, isn’t it David?” “Oh, I think we’re different in more ways than you think,” I replied. “No really, I’m serious,” Charles said, fully focused on me now, “How come we don’t know anything about you? We work together every day, go out together all the time, but all I know about you is that you moved from Kentucky a couple years back. Heck, I don’t even know what made you start working at the Patent Office.” “Yeah, what would make you ever want a government job?” Matt joked, “It’s not like you receive great benefits or anything.” “Well,” I began, “I got the job through my roommate, Marcie.” “The secretary?” asked Charles. “Yeah, she’s one of my oldest friends. We actually met in Kentucky when we were both in our college’s production of Hamlet. I was a freshman and she a senior, but she never treated me like a kid, which I liked. We stayed in touch when she moved down here, and once I graduated and passed the civil service exam I came down too.” “Just like that, huh?” Charles responded, “You didn’t have any plans to stay near home after graduation then?” “I didn’t know where to go after graduation. I just knew I needed to get away from my parents. Marcie told me she had room in her apartment and could get me a job at the Patent Office. So I gathered up just enough money for the trip down and left,” I said. “Did your parents handle you not staying nearby as well as mine did about me not going to school?” Matt said sarcastically. I laughed, “I think that was the least of their worries. I had strayed away from who they wanted me to be long before I left. They made that very clear.” They both nodded in complete understanding, just as many men in this bar would if they heard what I was saying. “Once my parents found out I was homosexual, there wasn’t much I could do right,” I said. I drank the last drop of my Tom Collins and began to hear “Blue Moon” start playing on the jukebox. I remember I didn’t tell Marcie I wouldn’t be coming home right after work tonight. “Let me guess, they found a dirty magazine filled with men in your room?” Charles offered. “No, actually I didn’t say or get caught doing anything. They just knew,” I admitted. “Wait, what?! Honestly, nothing was said between you?!” Charles exclaimed. Matt laughed in shock, but then looked impressed. “Uh yeah, I know, I know, but they already knew. I mean, they caught on eventually but they never brought it up. I was tired of the silent judgement and worry from my mother and even worse was my dad when he tried to talk to me about girls. I couldn’t stand it knowing that if I confirmed the idea that the thought of me going to hell, at least according to our Evangelical church, would likely kill my mother. Plus, my dad would probably want to be wiped clean of that sin and who knows how bad our congregation’s reaction would be to my parents. I didn’t want to harm their lives because of who I am, it would be too much for me to bear that my lifestyle caused them grief. So, I felt that I just needed to leave home and let them live their lives while I found mine.” “Well, at least you didn’t run away with your older boyfriend. That’s what my parents had to deal with,” said Charles. “Yeah, it wasn’t until I came down here actually that I started to see someone,” I responded. “David! How could you keep this from me? Tell me everything,” demanded Charles. I knew Matt already heard about this part of my past. He had come to visit Marcie, and she had to tell him when he came inside and noticed the hole I had punched in the wall of our apartment. “You know, asking David all of these questions is preventing you from getting out there and testing the waters,” Matt said. “This is too good to pass up though!” replied Charles. “It’s alright,” I said giving Matt a nod, “My ex, Travis, actually ended things with me two weeks ago.” “Tough going, what happened?” asked Charles. “Basically, he didn’t want to get found out by his boss. His boss doesn’t support homosexuality and Travis said that he could be fired if he found out,” I scoffed, suddenly I felt myself getting worked up, “I didn’t take that too well. I mean it’s one thing to end our relationship because he lost feelings, but no, he’s just a coward.” I realize that I’m now trembling with anger. I just can’t believe that someone would succumb like Travis did. I moved here to have the freedom to be myself and he refuses to stand up to bigotry with me. I thought I meant more to him . . . I would have given up my job for him. I loved him, I still do.

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Late Night
 The bartender nods and begins to mix the Tom Collins I had ordered seconds before. A gentle breeze blows into Uncle John’s bar as the door swings open, letting in more men who come to relax after a long week of work. I look around, taking in the new faces, and notice that Charles is already talking to someone new. Matthew sends me a knowing look from our table, and we laugh because we both know that won’t be the only man drawn to Charles tonight. “Here you are,” I hear the bartender say. I turn around and see my drink waiting for me on the dark oak bar. I hand him my cash and take a moment to admire my new haircut in the mirror before heading back to the table where Charles and Matt are alone again. “Well, I see you’ve broken a new record tonight,” I joke, “What – less than five minutes of us being here and you’ve already found someone?” “What’s so wrong with being social, huh? That’s what we’re here for now isn’t it? Anyway, it’s not my fault I’m irresistible,” Charles grinned as he sipped his cocktail. Matt chimes in, “Most of us are just trying to meet someone, while you on the other hand are apparently trying to meet every man in all of St. Louis.” We all laugh. Sometimes I forget that I’ve only known Matt and Charles for a couple of months. “You’re right! I guess I’m just an open book. I believe that sharing everything keeps us honest,” Charles continues with a smile, “See, that’s where we’re different, isn’t it David?” “Oh, I think we’re different in more ways than you think,” I replied. “No really, I’m serious,” Charles said, fully focused on me now, “How come we don’t know anything about you? We work together every day, go out together all the time, but all I know about you is that you moved from Kentucky a couple years back. Heck, I don’t even know what made you start working at the Patent Office.” “Yeah, what would make you ever want a government job?” Matt joked, “It’s not like you receive great benefits or anything.” “Well,” I began, “I got the job through my roommate, Marcie.” “The secretary?” asked Charles. “Yeah, she’s one of my oldest friends. We actually met in Kentucky when we were both in our college’s production of Hamlet. I was a freshman and she a senior, but she never treated me like a kid, which I liked. We stayed in touch when she moved down here, and once I graduated and passed the civil service exam I came down too.” “Just like that, huh?” Charles responded, “You didn’t have any plans to stay near home after graduation then?” “I didn’t know where to go after graduation. I just knew I needed to get away from my parents. Marcie told me she had room in her apartment and could get me a job at the Patent Office. So I gathered up just enough money for the trip down and left,” I said. “Did your parents handle you not staying nearby as well as mine did about me not going to school?” Matt said sarcastically. I laughed, “I think that was the least of their worries. I had strayed away from who they wanted me to be long before I left. They made that very clear.” They both nodded in complete understanding, just as many men in this bar would if they heard what I was saying. “Once my parents found out I was homosexual, there wasn’t much I could do right,” I said. I drank the last drop of my Tom Collins and began to hear “Blue Moon” start playing on the jukebox. I remember I didn’t tell Marcie I wouldn’t be coming home right after work tonight. “Let me guess, they found a dirty magazine filled with men in your room?” Charles offered. “No, actually I didn’t say or get caught doing anything. They just knew,” I admitted. “Wait, what?! Honestly, nothing was said between you?!” Charles exclaimed. Matt laughed in shock, but then looked impressed. “Uh yeah, I know, I know, but they already knew. I mean, they caught on eventually but they never brought it up. I was tired of the silent judgement and worry from my mother and even worse was my dad when he tried to talk to me about girls. I couldn’t stand it knowing that if I confirmed the idea that the thought of me going to hell, at least according to our Evangelical church, would likely kill my mother. Plus, my dad would probably want to be wiped clean of that sin and who knows how bad our congregation’s reaction would be to my parents. I didn’t want to harm their lives because of who I am, it would be too much for me to bear that my lifestyle caused them grief. So, I felt that I just needed to leave home and let them live their lives while I found mine.” “Well, at least you didn’t run away with your older boyfriend. That’s what my parents had to deal with,” said Charles. “Yeah, it wasn’t until I came down here actually that I started to see someone,” I responded. “David! How could you keep this from me? Tell me everything,” demanded Charles. I knew Matt already heard about this part of my past. He had come to visit Marcie, and she had to tell him when he came inside and noticed the hole I had punched in the wall of our apartment. “You know, asking David all of these questions is preventing you from getting out there and testing the waters,” Matt said. “This is too good to pass up though!” replied Charles. “It’s alright,” I said giving Matt a nod, “My ex, Travis, actually ended things with me two weeks ago.” “Tough going, what happened?” asked Charles. “Basically, he didn’t want to get found out by his boss. His boss doesn’t support homosexuality and Travis said that he could be fired if he found out,” I scoffed, suddenly I felt myself getting worked up, “I didn’t take that too well. I mean it’s one thing to end our relationship because he lost feelings, but no, he’s just a coward.” I realize that I’m now trembling with anger. I just can’t believe that someone would succumb like Travis did. I moved here to have the freedom to be myself and he refuses to stand up to bigotry with me. I thought I meant more to him . . . I would have given up my job for him. I loved him, I still do.
Late Night
 The bartender nods and begins to mix the Tom Collins I had ordered seconds before. A gentle breeze blows into Uncle John’s bar as the door swings open, letting in more men who come to relax after a long week of work. I look around, taking in the new faces, and notice that Charles is already talking to someone new. Matthew sends me a knowing look from our table, and we laugh because we both know that won’t be the only man drawn to Charles tonight. “Here you are,” I hear the bartender say. I turn around and see my drink waiting for me on the dark oak bar. I hand him my cash and take a moment to admire my new haircut in the mirror before heading back to the table where Charles and Matt are alone again. “Well, I see you’ve broken a new record tonight,” I joke, “What – less than five minutes of us being here and you’ve already found someone?” “What’s so wrong with being social, huh? That’s what we’re here for now isn’t it? Anyway, it’s not my fault I’m irresistible,” Charles grinned as he sipped his cocktail. Matt chimes in, “Most of us are just trying to meet someone, while you on the other hand are apparently trying to meet every man in all of St. Louis.” We all laugh. Sometimes I forget that I’ve only known Matt and Charles for a couple of months. “You’re right! I guess I’m just an open book. I believe that sharing everything keeps us honest,” Charles continues with a smile, “See, that’s where we’re different, isn’t it David?” “Oh, I think we’re different in more ways than you think,” I replied. “No really, I’m serious,” Charles said, fully focused on me now, “How come we don’t know anything about you? We work together every day, go out together all the time, but all I know about you is that you moved from Kentucky a couple years back. Heck, I don’t even know what made you start working at the Patent Office.” “Yeah, what would make you ever want a government job?” Matt joked, “It’s not like you receive great benefits or anything.” “Well,” I began, “I got the job through my roommate, Marcie.” “The secretary?” asked Charles. “Yeah, she’s one of my oldest friends. We actually met in Kentucky when we were both in our college’s production of Hamlet. I was a freshman and she a senior, but she never treated me like a kid, which I liked. We stayed in touch when she moved down here, and once I graduated and passed the civil service exam I came down too.” “Just like that, huh?” Charles responded, “You didn’t have any plans to stay near home after graduation then?” “I didn’t know where to go after graduation. I just knew I needed to get away from my parents. Marcie told me she had room in her apartment and could get me a job at the Patent Office. So I gathered up just enough money for the trip down and left,” I said. “Did your parents handle you not staying nearby as well as mine did about me not going to school?” Matt said sarcastically. I laughed, “I think that was the least of their worries. I had strayed away from who they wanted me to be long before I left. They made that very clear.” They both nodded in complete understanding, just as many men in this bar would if they heard what I was saying. “Once my parents found out I was homosexual, there wasn’t much I could do right,” I said. I drank the last drop of my Tom Collins and began to hear “Blue Moon” start playing on the jukebox. I remember I didn’t tell Marcie I wouldn’t be coming home right after work tonight. “Let me guess, they found a dirty magazine filled with men in your room?” Charles offered. “No, actually I didn’t say or get caught doing anything. They just knew,” I admitted. “Wait, what?! Honestly, nothing was said between you?!” Charles exclaimed. Matt laughed in shock, but then looked impressed. “Uh yeah, I know, I know, but they already knew. I mean, they caught on eventually but they never brought it up. I was tired of the silent judgement and worry from my mother and even worse was my dad when he tried to talk to me about girls. I couldn’t stand it knowing that if I confirmed the idea that the thought of me going to hell, at least according to our Evangelical church, would likely kill my mother. Plus, my dad would probably want to be wiped clean of that sin and who knows how bad our congregation’s reaction would be to my parents. I didn’t want to harm their lives because of who I am, it would be too much for me to bear that my lifestyle caused them grief. So, I felt that I just needed to leave home and let them live their lives while I found mine.” “Well, at least you didn’t run away with your older boyfriend. That’s what my parents had to deal with,” said Charles. “Yeah, it wasn’t until I came down here actually that I started to see someone,” I responded. “David! How could you keep this from me? Tell me everything,” demanded Charles. I knew Matt already heard about this part of my past. He had come to visit Marcie, and she had to tell him when he came inside and noticed the hole I had punched in the wall of our apartment. “You know, asking David all of these questions is preventing you from getting out there and testing the waters,” Matt said. “This is too good to pass up though!” replied Charles. “It’s alright,” I said giving Matt a nod, “My ex, Travis, actually ended things with me two weeks ago.” “Tough going, what happened?” asked Charles. “Basically, he didn’t want to get found out by his boss. His boss doesn’t support homosexuality and Travis said that he could be fired if he found out,” I scoffed, suddenly I felt myself getting worked up, “I didn’t take that too well. I mean it’s one thing to end our relationship because he lost feelings, but no, he’s just a coward.” I realize that I’m now trembling with anger. I just can’t believe that someone would succumb like Travis did. I moved here to have the freedom to be myself and he refuses to stand up to bigotry with me. I thought I meant more to him . . . I would have given up my job for him. I loved him, I still do.